Blogmalion

Placeholding redux

2011-11-20T05:12:00.002Z

I don't know if this blog qualifies as the least updated ever, but it's got to be right up there in the top 10, if not the top 5. The site updates a bit more frequently, but still not as frequently as I'd like. Partly it's because of RL commitments, but I guess at least part of it might be attributed to laziness... I am, after all, the founder-member of the Global Procrastination Society, or at least I will be, just as soon as I get around to setting it up.

One of the things I'd like to add to my site is... another cached archive site. Miraculously, I've managed to retrieve all of the pages and enough of the files to restore another little slice of ASFR nostalgia to the web. The only thing I don't have is permission from the site owner, or in fact any word from him at all, despite sending him a message ages ago. Maybe he didn't get it, or just decided not to reply, or maybe he's just another potential Procrastination Society member. I'll definitely make a more assertive effort to contact him in the next few days, and then hopefully I'll know whether or not he thinks the idea stinks.

Meanwhile, some of you may recall that I was writing an epic erotic web novel called Ketrin. What's up with that? Well... still writing it, slowly, scene by scene, painfully working out the complex plot details and praying I'll be able to get the damn thing finished... between those long, long periods when I'm not writing it, that is.

I have got to get around to starting that society.

Placeholding

2011-01-31T01:42:00.002Z

Just a little note to reassure you that I didn't die in 2009. I'm not saying this blog will necessarily be abuzz with updates from now on, but I might just find something to say every two or three months. We'll see.

Merry Christmas

2008-12-25T04:08:00.003Z

Well, it looks as if I may just manage to get one new story under my belt by December 31, bringing the annual total to 2, so it won't have been a totally wasted year. Part of the reason for my lack of productivity is that I've been involved in an unrelated non-web project which has been eating into more of my spare time than I thought it would. I may be doing less of that next year, and if so I'll have more time to write.

I'm also hoping to finish Ketrin Part 9, if not by the end of the year then at least by mid-January.

Oh, boy, Ketrin. Is it me, or does it seem slightly ludicrous to spend nine years writing a novel and only manage to complete 10,000 words a year? I keep telling myself to hurry up and finish the damn thing, but as usual it just crawls along at its own pace. Believe it or not, I do have an ending planned which will make some kind of logical sense and give satisfactory closure to the various character arcs,* and nobody will be happier than me if I manage to complete it before the ice caps melt.**

The thing is, I've always considered Ketrin to be my baby. I've lavished what I hope is some good prose and plotting on it, and I've always tried to make the characters and their environments as varied and interesting as possible. Unfortunately, that means anyone who wants to read it just for the porn is going to be disappointed by all the non-erotic material, and anyone who just wants an adventure story may be put off by the sex.

Or am I just over-analysing here? The last thing I want to do is come across like Dan Shive, bless him, who spends an entire page analysing the minutiae of each six-panel strip.

I did post a link to Ketrin on Pages Unbound, where it received glowing praise for its prose and some useful criticism over other points. But apart from that solicited opinion, I've had little or no feedback about the story. (No, Marc, I'm not talking about you.) I supose I shouldn't complain too much - this is the internet, after all, where anything can happen and very seldom does, and when it does it's often with glacial sloth.** All I'm saying is, if there is anyone out there who's actually reading and enjoying my stories then please, please, please let me know about it. There's the link, right over there.

Have a great Christmas and I'll try to update more frequently n 2009.

----
*Note: I've never liked the term "arc" because it implies something that goes up and then comes crashing back down again. I'd prefer a word that suggests continuous progress instead, but apparently there isn't one in common usage.

**I believe these two references constitute a mixed metaphor of sorts. If the ice caps melt there won't be any glaciers either.

Wow, no updates for over a year

2008-07-31T20:23:00.004+01:00

Checking my site stats, I notice that I had a couple of visits from the link on Blogmalion, which reminded me that it's been over a year since I updated. I originally set up this blog to talk about all of the exciting projects related to my site... except that there haven't really been that many at all. Shamefully it's been well over a year since I wrote a female story (Flora and Fauna), and over six months since I posted my last male story (part 8 of Ketrin). Most of the updates over the past few months have been related to other people's work, most notably the Taral Wayne gallery, but when it comes to writing my own fiction the muse seems to be taking an extended vacation right now, although I have been slowly working on Ketrin Parts 9 and 10. Believe it or not, I do have an ending planned for Ketrin, although at the rate I'm going it'll be years before anyone gets to read it, and I'm as depressed about that as anybody.

Meanwhile, some stupid mother****** went and spammed out the Pygmalion Yahoo! Group, but I'm less pissed off about the spammer than about Yahoo!'s apparent indifference to the problem. Abandoned groups are sprouting spam like weeds and Yahoo! does nothing about it. Does anyone have a physical address for the Yahoo! Groups HQ, preferably with a large window through which some heavy blunt object might hypothetically be thrown???

Anyway, this is just to let everybody know that I'm not quite ready to drop dead yet, and neither is this blog. As always feedback, criticism and/or advice would be appreciated.... anybody? Hello?

How stupid do they think I am?

2007-06-28T17:24:00.000+01:00

Here's an e-mail I received today:

My name is Michael ******** and I work for ********.com. I enjoyed visiting your website, which was adeptly designed and rich with content, and I would like to extend an invitation to you to join our affiliate program.

It doesn't cost you anything to join and you will earn cash commissions on sales resulting from referrals from your site. Here's how it works: first you place one of our banner ads on your site, which you have the option of style and size and then you earn an 8% commission on the orders you refer through the banner ad. You will be paid monthly through paypal when your balance meets or exceeds $10.00.

Some information about us: ********.com has satisfied thousands of customers worldwide and the average order size is $250. We list over 90,000 different products on our site.

If you are interested please register on our site for the program: register now or if you would like further information about the program please read the terms and conditions page and please feel free to contact me with any other concerns or questions that you may have.

Thank you for time it is greatly appreciated.
Michael ********

It's nice to know that my site is "adeptly designed and rich with content", but why do I get the feeling that they haven't even read the fucking thing?

Meet the new year... same as the old year?

2007-01-15T02:19:00.000Z

Good grief, look at the time. It's already halfway through January, one twenty-fourth of the year has gone already, and what have I got to show for it?

Well, I have spent some time working on a new female story and I've been plotting the next instalment of Ketrin. In addition, I've been looking for some of the missing images on the Medusa Realm Statue Art Pages.

Last year I managed to complete 7 new stories. That's pretty good - I only managed to beat that once, with 8 stories in 2004. I'd love to match or exceed that total this year, but I'm juggling several other projects at the moment, not all of them related to the site, and sadly none of them involving money.

Anyway, given that not all I'm doing is related to the site I've decided that not all of my blog post will be related to it either. Stay tuned for some of my crappy opinions on all and sundry.

MX Missive

2006-12-23T02:03:00.000Z

A Merry Christmas and a Happy 2007 to all my thousands of demented fans.

Um, sorry, that was meant to read "devoted". I think.

Next year I hope to turn this into a real blog where I post more than once every three months. All I need to do is find something to say every week or two. That should be easy, I mean, what about... um...

Sigh.

See you in the New Year.

I ate'nt dead

2006-10-11T03:47:00.000+01:00

Ever had several of those months when you just can't think of anything to say?

Misfortunecity resolved

2006-07-31T01:00:00.000+01:00

Well, the domain is safe, at least until next renewal time rolls around. I finally convinced Fortunecity's stupid software to accept my money. I'd be dancing for joy if I wasn't about ready to collapse from nervous exhaustion.

Misfortunecity

2006-07-16T19:39:00.000+01:00

As you'll have seen on the homepage (assuming anyone gives a shit) Fortunecity is threatening to suspend my account because new security features mean their software isn't recognising my credit card account. How they have the nerve to call it a security feature is beyond me because it's causing me insecurities. Thanks to some stupid little software glitch I could end up losing my carefully nurtured domain, which over the years has managed to build up a page rank of 4/10, through no fault of my own. If that happens I will be so fucking angry I don't know what I'll do. One thing is certain, though. If Fortunecity loses my domain for me I will diss them from the highest rooftops.

Stay tuned.

K7

2006-05-23T22:54:00.000+01:00

I've had an idea.

Not that I don't have lots of ideas... some of them very good ideas, althugh never quite good enough to bring me wealth and power, for some reason... but this is an idea that may save my bacon, plotwise, when it comes to finishing the story of Ketrin.

Ketrin is an ongoing male-male freeze story that I've been tinkering with (ooh, matron) since the autumn of 1999. In that time I've managed to complete 6 instalments totalling over 60,000 words. This is admittedly slow going by Tom Clancy standards, but after all I'm doing it in my spare time and I kept getting hung up on plot complications, mostly as in how the hell to get the characters from A to B in such a way that it looks inevitable.

I've written lots of other stories, but Ketrin is my pet project, an attempt to combine my agalmatophilia with my fascination with Kipling's original Jungle Books (dancing bears need not apply). The title character Ketrin is basically a grown-up, mostly-gay, Mowgli (and like the original Mowgli he's naked and unashamed).

For a long time now I've been stuck on a major plot development that's supposed to happen at the end of Part 7. And then yesterday I had an astonishing flash of insight into how the plot was supposed to go, which not only gave me the perfect ending for Part Seven but showed me how to wrap up the story into a neat bundle once I finally get around to the last instalment.

The really frustrating thing, of course, is that I can't tell you what the astonishing insight was without giving away the whole damn story. You'll just have to read it and see for yourself. It's been over a year since Part Six, but I'm determined to finish Part Seven by midsummer.

It would of course be nice if once it's finally posted somebody would e-mail me to say "yay" or even "boo", but on past experience I don't hold out too much hope.

Meanwhile on the subject of me

2006-04-19T12:20:00.000+01:00

I recently posted a message on the Naga's Den Forum (Random Chat thread) asking for comments on my site design. As a result of some of those comments I removed all of the tiled backgrounds from my site (which was a long job as every page had them) to improve readability, and changed the red text to green because I was told bright contrasting colours can cause eyestrain. On the other hand, the green headings look a bit weird to me, so I might change it back again.

I recently completed a male story, now called Trophy, which I'd been working on under various titles for about four years. Feels weird to finally let it out into the big wide world after all that time. 8800 words in four years works out to just over 6 words per day.

Brian, who's illustrated some of my male stories, pointed out that I hadn't posted any new male stories since last summer, so to redress the balance the next couple of stories I complete will also be male. Apologies to my hordes of fans who were expecting more female action.

Call them irresponsible

2006-04-19T03:19:00.000+01:00

I see that my pals at Studs in Stone are among the latest targets of Portal of Evil (which I'm not going to include a link to).

Portal of Evil is basically a site where members can list sites that strike them as misguided, irresponsible or wrong and then have a damn good sneer at them. They've already had a go at The Wotch, Naga's Den, Fragments and El Goonish Shive. Oh, yes - and me. Now some people may claim that POE is harmless fun - they direct a bit of traffic to their target sites, and some visitors may decide to return. They also forbid any direct contact between their correspondents and the target sites or their related messageboards or blogs. But what pisses me off about them is their cynical attitude - they lump webcomics and fetishes together with survivalists and white supremacists and have a damn good sneer at all of them. Come to think of it, that just seems misguided, irresponsible and wrong....

Speaking of irresponsible, I just happened to tune into Fox News and as usual wished I hadn't. They had some so-called terrorism expert on the show to talk about various types of nuclear weapon and how easy it would be to smuggle them into the United States. When asked how long he thought it would be before someone succeeded, he replied "a couple of years".

Now, I consider this slightly unlikely for one reason: nuclear materials are dangerous and difficult to handle. If a terrorist tries to build an atomic bomb in his basement he will quite definitely get radiation sickness and die, and good riddance. Building a bomb requires industrial facilities, and all of the places that could be used for such a purpose, in Iran or wherever, are already under close scrutiny by the US and its allies.

I just wish somebody would invent a bomb that only destroyed conservative journalists while leaving their money undamaged.

I'm on a roll

2006-02-20T14:04:00.000Z

This month I managed to complete another story - The Fountain.

http://www.p-synd.com/fountain.htm

That's two stories posted in just six weeks. If I can keep it up it'll be my most productive year ever (and bear in mind that in my least productive year I only managed a pathetic three stories). Just as long as I don't hit the dreaded writer's block... ow! Damn!

NYSOC

2006-01-23T11:38:00.000Z

The trouble with winter in England is not that it's cold (compared to New York it's positively balmy) but that it's dull, drizzly and depressing. Shortly after Christmas there was a bit of snow which as usual completely paralysed the rail network, but since then it's just been drab and grey as usual.

In spite of the gloom I've managed to get creative again. Picked up a quarter-finished story and ran with it until it was half-finished and then posted that half - don't hold your breath for the second...

http://www.p-synd.com/cholaseki1-2.htm

...and then started a new story which I don't have much to say about it yet except that I'm quite happy with the way the writing is coming along. I've included some fairly highbrow prose, and I flatter myself that my choice of words is very carefully thought out. Wouldn't know it from reading this, would you?

Meanwhile my male-male serial story Ketrin is still crawling along. For those of you who haven't read it, imagine what would happen if Mowgli (the original naked Mowgli, not any of the film or TV versions) grew up and had erotic adventures, many of them while under a paralysing curse.

I'm currently working on Part Seven. Right now I know where the characters are and I know where I need to get them to, and I'm still trying to figure out how to get them there. Usually after struggling with the plot for a while I go off and do other stuff for a month, and this is why each instalment takes so long to complete. I'm really sorry about that, because I want to finish the thing before we all die of old age or boredom.

Speaking of old age, they just launched the New Horizons space probe to Pluto. I'm sure I'll have a few more grey hars by the time it arrives in 2015, but hopefully I'll still be here and so will the ASFR community, along with planet Earth. If not, been nice knowing you.

L x NC

2005-10-11T11:03:00.000+01:00

It's been a while since my last post, partly because I've been lazy and partly because I didn't have much to say. I could have commented on Hurricane Katrina, but I felt as if there was nothing I could say that would add one crumb of comfort to the survivors or shed any great insight into the situation.

And now there's the Kashmir earthquake. The name Kashmir always conjures up mixed emotions. Thanks to the Led Zeppelin song I have this view of an exotic and magical place called Kashmir, and yet I know that in reality it's a war zone.

The earthquake has of course affected people on both sides of the conflict, and I can't help thinking that if anything good comes out of it, it will be to bring the two sides closer together in their shared suffering.

Or maybe they'll just ignore each other's suffering and only worry about their own and the conflict will just carry on as though nothing had happened. I hope not, but on past experience I'm not placing any bets.

One born every second

2005-08-03T11:40:00.000+01:00

According to a recent news report, there is now a new blog created every SECOND. That's 3,600 every hour, or 86,400 a day, or 31,536,000 per year, or about one for every two passengers who use Heathrow Airport each year.

Given this vast number, how can any individual blog hope to stand out in a crowd? The idea of blogs is to spread your personal thoughts and opinions around, but what are the odds of anyone reading your blog rather than some of the other 31 million that'll be added this year?

Gulp.

HEY! I'M OVER HERE! CAN ANYONE HEAR ME? ANYONE AT ALL? HELLO???

Better late than never

2005-07-30T01:50:00.000+01:00

There's been some cautious rejoicing this week over the news that the Provisional IRA has decided to give up what it calls the "armed struggle", a phrase that always reminds me of the line from Monty Python's Life of Brian: "it's symbolic of his struggle against reality".

I can't help wondering if the IRA is giving up violence because it's finally realised that it wil not achieve its goals that way, or just because it can't compete against real evil bastards like Al Qaeda.

Rabid Fox redux

2005-07-28T01:31:00.000+01:00

Just to belatedly add a few more points to the recent post: a couple of weeks ago I had the misfortune to tune in to Bill O'Reilly who was claiming that the BBC had a policy of banning the word "terrorist" from its news broadcasts.

Bull......shit.

If it wasn't disgusting enough that Fox should be using the London bombings try to score points off a rival broadcaster, it's also a filthy lie. One of many, I'm sure.

The more I see of Fox News the more I hate it. Not only do their graphics give me serious migraines, but their opinions are often both offensive and, from a British perspective, just fucking weird. It's like they're broadcasting from a different planet. It sure ain't the one I'm living on.

The BBC has indeed referred, and continues to refer, to the London bombers and likewise the Egyptian bombers, as terrorists. It also frequently refers to them as suicide bombers, a phrase which can in no sense be regarded as politically correct. But don't take my word for it.

If you don't have direct access to BBC broadcasts, go to http://www.bbc.co.uk/ and follow the relevant links to News and Radio. BBC Radio 4 has a half-hour bulletin at 6PM on weekdays (1PM Eastern, 10 AM Pacific) and Radio 5 Live has continuous news and sports coverage. Just click on Listen Live. Alternatively, watch the BBC News bulletins on BBC World TV or BBC America. Listen to what the BBC is actually saying, not what Fox wants you to believe it's saying.

(Incidentally, BBC America, which the BBC only part-owns, is basically a piece of crap, cutting British shows to fit commercial timeslots, compressing the sound to buggery, screwing with the closing credits, and totally lacking the style and warmth of a real BBC channel. The news is really the only decent thing about it.)

The rabid Fox is yapping again

2005-07-12T01:38:00.000+01:00

Once again the unfair and imbalanced Fox News is bleating about BBC bias over the so-called War on Terror and Iraq. I just heard Bill O'Reilly (aka Mr Spin) claim that Fox was going to take on the BBC. In your dreams, pal. The British broadcasting regulator Ofcom called Fox out for lying about the BBC before and they'll do it again if need be.

Personally I'd love to see Fox "take on" Auntie because the BBC would wipe the floor with them, except that they're far too dignified ever to dignify Fox's obnoxious lies with a response. I just wish Fox would do something so outrageous that Ofcom withdraws their British broadcasting licence. Then listen to them whine.

PS I know "too dignified to dignify" is a bit of an awkward construction, but right now I can't think of a better expression.

7/7

2005-07-11T14:40:00.000+01:00

I've tried to think of something profound to say about the recent attacks in London. About the best I can come up with so far is something I once read about people getting bored with the newspapers when they don't publish juicy stories about war, famine, disaster and human misery.

I hope the newspapers stay boring for a very long time after this.

Aqua Cruise

2005-06-21T02:17:00.000+01:00

Bwaaahaaahaaa!! Tom Cruise got splashed with water and said they shouldna oughta!!!

Next time a mature and sophisticated comment. Maybe.

Pseudo cool

2005-06-08T23:06:00.000+01:00

Today I successfully completed a Sudoku puzzle for the first time. I was filled with an unspeakable sense of exhilaration and achievement that will probably remain with me to the end of my days.

Waaaaaaaaaaaaah!!! I have no life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I got mail

2005-06-06T17:51:00.000+01:00

On June 5, a week after The Pygmalion Syndrome's 5th anniversary, I got an e-mail from Brian56321 with a piece of artwork attached. It seems that Brian had read and enjoyed my adult story Mist in Stone and decided to produce a piece of computer art based upon it. (NB although it illustrates an erotic story the picture is worksafe unless you work somewhere that bans pictures of nude statues.) So I posted it as an illustration to the story and even used it as wallpaper for that page.

The really astonishing thing about Brian's picture is that it's the first time anyone has ever sent me an illustration based on one of my stories. In fact it's the first time this particular story has garnered any kind of feedback at all.

So if anyone happens to be reading this post and would like to help rectify the situation, please drop me a line. I'd be more than happy to see any original art or photomanips based on my stories or just inspired by their general tone, and if they're good enough I'll post them on my site with full attribution to the creators (pseudonyms strictly respected). I'd love to hear from you.

Aurora spyware killer a bust

2005-05-25T13:58:00.000+01:00

Crap. Still getting popups. So much for miracle cures.

Heads up: Aurora spyware killer

2005-05-25T03:02:00.000+01:00

Just recently I've been plagued by pop-up banners from something called Aurora. Apparently this is a new and particularly irritating form of spyware as it gets into your registry and keeps disguising itself so that when you think you've erased it it comes right back.

The following is an address for what claims to be a cure: a tiny program that can eliminate the bug completely. I've already tried it and it seems to work. At least, I've seen no more Aurora banners since I installed it, and as far as I can tell it hasn't replaced it with anything worse. So if you're having Aurora trouble, you might want to try it yourself:

http://www.noidea.us/easyfile/file.php?show=20050515010747824

I'm already queueing to buy the popcorn

2005-05-13T15:02:00.000+01:00

Headline in today's London Daily Mirror Entertainment supplement: "Episode III: The Sith hits the fans". Sadly not 100% original (Google returns 64 hits for the phrase) but it gave me a chuckle anyway.

Weren't you listening to FDR?

2005-05-12T18:27:00.000+01:00

On May 11 a small aircraft strayed into the security zone over Washington DC. Fighter planes were deployed and Federal offices emptied amid fears of a new 9/11 style attack.

Fortunately it was only a small Cessna that had apparently strayed into restricted airspace by mistake. News pundits will probably spend a few days arguing about whether the evacuation was necessary or orderly, but they'll all breathe a sigh of relief that at least it wasn't a terrorist attack this time.

Well, no, but it was a terrorist victory.

What do I mean by that exactly?

Even though nobody was killed or injured, even though no property was destroyed, this incident did exactly what the terrorist wanted. IT SCARED THE SHIT OUT OF PEOPLE. The evacuated people's faces on TV looked almost as shocked and horrified as if they'd been in a real attack.

I'm quite sure that when OBL heard about the incident he had a damn good laugh over it. And why not?

Look, they call these people terrorists, right? Not murderists or destructionists, because murder and destruction are only means to achieve their goal. And that goal is to create a climate of fear and confusion amongst their enemies which will eventually lead to their enemies weakening.

So, if you were afraid or terrified in Washington yesterday, too bad. You played right into their hands.

Unfortunately some people are all too willing to buy into the paranoid hysteria whipped up by politicians and journalists in the wake of terrorist outrages. Franklin D. Roosevelt said the only thing to fear is fear itself, and that was back in the days when there were some really scary people around.

Just try to remember his advice next time, OK?

In other news...

2005-05-06T13:03:00.000+01:00

There was an election. Somebody won it.

Grabbed by the Nuts

2005-05-02T04:22:00.000+01:00

No, that's not a political headline.

There's a commercial currently running on British TV that qualifies for the so-stupid-it's-brilliant category.

Three guys walking down the street happen to see a poster which reads "NIBBLE NOBBY'S NUTS". They go into a pub where they are amazed to see former Slade frontman Noddy Holder reading a paper. Misinterpreting the poster's instructions the make a dive for Noddy's groin and he has to fight them off. "NOT NODDY," he roars in his trademark Slade style, "NOBBY! CAN'T ANY OF YOU PEOPLE READ?" Their misunderstanding thus cleared up, out heroes settle down to nibble some Nobby's (pea)Nuts.

The commercial hasn't encouraged me to nibble anybody's nuts, but I have dug out my old Slade albums from the 1970s. And it is kinda nice to see the old fart back on the telly again.

E, ba gum, Charles!

2005-04-08T22:55:00.000+01:00

While attending the Pope's funeral, and no doubt grumbling over the inconvenience of having had to move his own wedding and miss the Grand National because of it, His Royal Prince Charlesness chanced to shake hands with Zimbabwe's crazed psychopathic evil dictator Dr. Robert Mugabe.

HRH's press sec immediately issued a statement that Mugabe caught the Prince by surprise. I might venture to suggest that it does not speak well for the Prince's mental agility, that when proffered the hand of a brutal butcher the Prince immediately returned the handshake instead of immediately decking the bastard. For crying out loud, Charles, he's a lot older than you are. I bet your dad would have taken him out in spite of his age, or failing that said something really nasty about him. Boy, that would have shown him.

OBTW: Just how did Mugabe get to the Vatican anyway? HE'S BANNED FROM ENTERING THE EUROPEAN UNION. All right, so technically Vatican City is a separate state and not part of the EU....

BUT ROME AIRPORT IS PART OF THE EU, SO HOW DID HE GET TO THE BLEEDIN' VATICAN IN THE FIRST PLACE? GAH!

Whoever you vote for the Government gets in

2005-04-06T01:37:00.000+01:00

Oh, joy. Another General Election. On 5 April our beloved Prime Minister Tony Blah announced that the Election would take place on 5 May.

Still, say what you will, the British system does have one advantage: the campaigns are nice and short. Apart from some speculative canvassing over the past few months, the electioneering will occupy a period of precisely 4 weeks and 2 days, and then we can get back to our favourite pastime of spending the next five years complaining about whichever party we happen to sweep into power.

Compare and contrast this with the American system, where it seems that the second half of every President's term is spent preparing for the next Election instead of doing something more worthwhile, like looking for a new country to fight a war for freedom in.

Incidentally, I'm reminded of the apocryphal (oh, look it up) story of a Chinese politician who asked his British counterpart if it was true that the British only hold their genital erection every five years.

So much for satire....

2005-04-05T14:19:00.000+01:00

In the news: Prince Charles delays his wedding to Camilla Parker-Bowles by one day, in order to attend the funeral of Pope John Paul II.

"Hello, I'm a widower who's marrying a divorcee and my mater's the head of a Protestant church, and I'm here to pay my last respects to the Holy Father."

Is there anybody out there???

2005-04-04T02:50:00.000+01:00

Cross-posted from the Pygmalion Syndrome's What's New page...

Put up the new 5th Anniversary logo in preparation for the actual event at the end of May.Well, I call it an event, but from all the feedback I get around here it could well be the non-event of the season, if not the century.

Nobody ever seems to write to me these days. Was it something I said? There’s an e-mail link on on every page. I realise that everybody’s busy and people tend to neglect e-mail. I’ve been guilty of that myself sometimes. All I’m saying is, it would be kinda nice to have a little recognition for half a decade of effort.

Here’s a suggestion. If anyone is actually reading this, please read some of my stories - even just one of them - if you haven’t already done so, and then write and tell me what you think of it. Or view some of the works of art in the site's Art Gallery section and tell me what you think of them. Or write and tell me what you think of my logos, or my page layout, or my fonts, or the weather in your home town. Just to let me know I’m not just pissing in the wind here. Otherwise I may end up celebrating the Anniversary by banging my head against the desk all day. (And no, that will not be webcast. Nor will me pissing in the wind.)

Let's We Forget. Sorry...Lest We Forget.

2005-04-01T01:25:00.000+01:00

Some important historical anniversaries on this day:

1794: Sir Thomas McKenzie of Dundee is reported to have remarked: “By gad, sirrah, ’tis perishing cold for a spring day.” Shortly after making this observation Sir Thomas is said to have died of pneumonia, thereby achieving posthumous vindication. It is not known whether the kilt was a contributing factor in his demise.

1867: William Blatsford of Wolverhampton successfully patented his steam-powered windmill and hat-making machine. Sadly no examples are believed to have survived.

1896: Charles Wallace of Leeds demonstrated what he claimed to be the world’s first perpetual motion bicycle. Sadly this claim was never verified, because after riding off on his machine Wallace never came back. This has however been regarded by some as proof in itself.

PS Don't fail to forget to put all clocks forward by 1/27th of a second today to correct for the precession of the Equinoxes.

Lies, damned lies and my damned statistics

2005-03-29T01:25:00.000+01:00

Well, as usual my site's not exactly overwhelmed with traffic, but analysing what I do get, and more to the point where it comes from, yields some possibly interesting results. (I wanted to include the URLs, but Blogger kept fucking them up.)

*21 from Sakura (Japan);

*15 redirected from my old addresses, so I can't tell where they originally came from;

*10 from Google (searching for "pygmalion syndrome" or "pygmalion syndrome portal")

*8 from LTBSA;

*8 from Metamorphose;

*8 from Yahoo! Directory (society and culture/sexuality/fetishes and fantasies/statues mannequins and dolls);

*4 from Gorgon Art;

*2 from Petrification Parlour Group;

*2 from Women Statue Lovers Group.

Site stats courtesy Nedstat.

I guess the moral is that I should keep spreading my URL as far and wide as possible. Once again, thanks to Sakura for spontaneously linking to me, and arigato to any Japanese surfers who've been encouraged to visit. Please tell every single one of your friends to drop by at least three times a day. Um, assuming of course that you, and they, read English better than I read Japanese!

And anybody out there who has the secret of attracting hundreds of visitors a week... PLEEEEASEE TELLLLLL MEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!

Is this thing on?

2005-03-19T07:27:00.000Z

You know how it is. Everybody's got one, so you start to feel left out without one. So here it is: the Pygmalion Syndrome's very own blog. Whenever I have something to say I'll post it here and when I don't I won't. Um, and that's about all I have to say for now. Do call again later, in the desperate hope that I might actually have some interesting opinions about something or other....